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Old Oct 12, 2009, 10:18 AM   #1
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Default Making suet

Welp.... I'm having my first go at it and I gotta tell ya - it stinks! No... literally. It stinks! I've set off the smoke detectors once (so far) and, did I mention the smell? I have two pounds of this stuff, been at it for the better part of a half hour, my eyes are burning out from the smoke and I MIGHT have 2 cups worth of liquid. Did I mention the smell?

~~~~ Some time later (eternity, I think)

I'm done. Grease spatter burns on my arms, my eyes will never be quite the same - I just know it. My dog hates me. If we had any resident bugs in the house, they've made their exit gracefully. I managed to get enough liquid for 4 cakes -- that's 1/2 & 1/2 suet and seed. The house stinks and I'm burning scented candles but it doesn't seem to be helping. My wife is due home for lunch. She will NOT be a happy camper... might even blow breakfast as she walks through the already-open door. She might come in through one of the open windows. Not sure. In any event, all the open portals will be handy for me to make my escape.

Trust me -- 80 cents a cake is an absolute bargain for these things!

Excuse me. I have to scrape the grease that is splattered all over the stove and countertop.
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Old Oct 12, 2009, 10:58 AM   #2
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hahahaha ya sometimes it just doesnt pay not to pay. 80 cents doesnt sound so bad does it? Oh, did you mention the smell?
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Old Oct 12, 2009, 4:02 PM   #3
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LOL! Your description of your kitchen makes it sound like Rudyard Kipling's Great Gray-green Greasy Limpopo! Good thing you are not a bird - you would starve in winter. That smell may attract them (and yes, birds do have a sense of smell) and provide some good photo ops for you this winter. And you have done your little friends a good deed, providing lots of calories to keep them warm.
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Old Oct 12, 2009, 4:34 PM   #4
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LOL! Your description of your kitchen makes it sound like Rudyard Kipling's Great Gray-green Greasy Limpopo! Good thing you are not a bird - you would starve in winter. That smell may attract them (and yes, birds do have a sense of smell) and provide some good photo ops for you this winter. And you have done your little friends a good deed, providing lots of calories to keep them warm.
Yeah... I could've done that without the risk of divorce and my dog hating me.
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Old Oct 12, 2009, 4:35 PM   #5
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LOL! Your description of your kitchen makes it sound like Rudyard Kipling's Great Gray-green Greasy Limpopo! Good thing you are not a bird - you would starve in winter. That smell may attract them (and yes, birds do have a sense of smell) and provide some good photo ops for you this winter. And you have done your little friends a good deed, providing lots of calories to keep them warm.
Each Spring I collect gobs of fur from my dog, and hang them on a tree. Suet? Ain't worth a damn compared to dog fur when it comes to making birds go bananas! They go nuts, and fight over every little piece of fur!

(Of course, once the next building season is over, they don't give a damn... )

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Old Oct 12, 2009, 4:37 PM   #6
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hahahaha ya sometimes it just doesnt pay not to pay. 80 cents doesnt sound so bad does it? Oh, did you mention the smell?
80 cents is a steal! I may have mentioned the smell but, in case you missed it.... this stuff STINKS!!
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Old Oct 12, 2009, 4:40 PM   #7
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Each Spring I collect gobs of fur from my dog, and hang them on a tree. Suet? Ain't worth a damn compared to dog fur when it comes to making birds go bananas! They go nuts, and fight over every little piece of fur!
(Of course, once the next building season is over, they don't give a damn... )
Dave
Well, they can't eat the fur, but it does make for a warm nest - our dogs undercoats have provided a lot of nest lining, too.
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Old Oct 12, 2009, 5:57 PM   #8
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Well, they can't eat the fur, but it does make for a warm nest - our dogs undercoats have provided a lot of nest lining, too.
I no longer have a place upstate. So to amuse my neighbors, I keep a wad of fur around. We sit down on a stoop, and I spread the fur out on the sidewalk only a few feet from where we are sitting.

Well, takes about a minute and the House Sparrows arive in droves, and start screaming and yelling at each other, while they go about wadding it up in their beaks, until they can barely fly. It's really hysterical. Next year I'm going to photograph this comedy.

(And after gjtoth has so lovingly described his nightmare, I'm definitiely sticking to fur)

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